Today would have been my mother’s 80th birthday. When she passed away in April of 2020, our family received many kind and beautiful emails, letters and cards. Most of these messages conveyed a consistent theme about my mother’s delightfully bright smile. She had a secret behind that smile – you see, my mother always had on her lipstick.
Growing up, my siblings and I found our mother’s application and re-application of lipstick quite annoying, especially as we became teenagers. Depending on my mother’s schedule, she could be found putting on her lipstick at red lights, stop signs or in the pick-up lane at school. As soon as a meal ended in a restaurant – boom, out came the lipstick and mirror. My mother kept her lipstick with her at all times.
At some point during my college years, my mother suggested that I too apply lipstick before leaving the house to start my day. When I asked her why, she explained that lipstick brightened the smile and provided us with confidence to face each day in a positive way. With her lipstick on, my mother’s face was bright and welcoming despite any problem she may have been facing. Lipstick became my mother’s daily strategy for dealing with all of life’s challenges, and she wanted to offer this same opportunity to me. Ever since our talk, wearing my lipstick became one of the many daily positivity strategies that I, too, have utilized.
My mother suffered from memory loss in her late 60’s, which ultimately led to Alzheimer’s disease in her mid-70’s. During this period, she lost many layers of the person we once knew. My mother was with us, but in many ways she became somebody we did not recognize. Not so surprisingly, however, applying her lipstick remained one of my mother’s most enduring daily habits throughout her entire illness. In fact, even as her memory loss became severe, my mother was sure to chastise me if she caught me without my lipstick on! I still smile knowing that, even though everything had changed in her life, the positivity my mother experienced from wearing her lipstick and seeing it on me remained a cornerstone of her bright outlook.
While lipstick comes in all shade, colors and textures, your ‘lipstick strategy’ can be anything that you do to start off each day feeling good about yourself. Today, in honor of my mother, perhaps think about what you could choose for your lipstick and let me know how it works out. I would be delighted to hear from you!
such a beautiful piece in honor of your beautiful mother ❤️ עליו השלום
I do remember her always looking in her purse for her lipstick. Never gave it a thought.
She always had it with her and searching through her purse was a big part of her routine!
A beautiful remembrance. Thanks for sharing. May her memory be a blessing.
Thank you Dana!
I love this! Your mom looks so pretty in that picture. Her desk was in front of mine when we worked together at the travel agency. I’m trying to remember if I always saw her putting her lipstick on. I do remember that she was always so nice and caring. Thank you for this wonderful piece. It put a smile on my face and I am NOT wearing lipstick. I should be!
Betsy, I love hearing stories about my mom. She loved all the socializing in that travel agency. I’m glad that my memory made you smile!
Thank you, Sheila, for sharing the link. Our mom always “put on her lipstick” until the end of her precious life. I wanted to share this with my sisters.
Beautifully written, and a beautiful tribute.
Darlene..
Love this. What a beautiful tribute and memory of your mom.
Thank you so much Lauren!
I love this! Thanks for brightening my smile. Off to apply some lipstick. 🙂
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